Used to I didn't understand the value of stopping to shake a hand. I used to think social interaction outside the mechanical achieving of a shared aim was a wasteful use of time. Why wait on niceties when there is so much work to be done, I used to think. Then I discovered how important it is when a person pauses to spend a moment with me and to acknowledge my value to them. I realized that if I don't pause to let people know their value to me then I send the opposite message, that they are not valuable to me, which is the wrong message because they are very valuable. Now I take the time to shake hands and look into people's eyes and ask real questions seeking real answers.

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Bill, you were right. I discovered that the problem was a lack of communication between myself and the person who was causing the delay in meeting the objective. I decided to listen to what he had to say and there were good reasons for the delay on his part. So what must I do to develop better communication with others?

First, understand that communication occurs when there is a common link between the receiver and sender. When we create conditions where others are reluctant to talk with us because of rejection or the possibility of receiving a blasting from us they fail to make an effort to communicate. We must make every effort to create an atmosphere conducive to others telling us both good and bad news. They must feel that we will make every effort to understand their situation and work with them to resolve the problem. Think about those you enjoy talking with. How do they respond to your conversation? I bet they listen and try to relate to your situation. Try this approach and you will become a better communicator. Remember that Jesus said we have ears to hear but we don’t listen, eyes to see but we don’t see. So use those eyes and ears to listen and hear.

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Bill, what do I do when someone does not meet an agreed deadline? Sometimes it is a vendor; other times it is an employee or co-worker who does not do what they have agreed to do. Many times it is my responsibility to deliver the product or service but someone else messes up. This makes me mad and many times I lose control and blast the person or persons involved. What would you do?

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Bill, how can I become a better speaker?

It is critical for a leader to express himself or herself well. Making presentations is a part of almost every job. One of the most important parts of speaking well is passion. Passion for a subject will make up for a lot of mistakes a person might make in speaking. Most presentations will consist of a problem, solution and action plan. By applying this principle you can make dynamic presentations. This does not mean that your verbal skills will not be important. Our choice of words, rate of speech, accent, pitch, voice inflection and volume are certainly important, however, when you speak with passion these things seem to fall into place.

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Bill, how can I develop followers?

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Bill, how can I develop the skills to lead other people?

Hugo, you will find that in order to lead others the skill you need to develop is the ability to listen. By listening to the people you want to lead you hear what motivates them. Many times leaders are too busy thinking about their own goals and not listening to those who they depend upon to reach their own goals. Find out what is important to each of those you lead. Show an interest in their goals and find ways to help them achieve the success they desire. This will help you gain their loyalty and commitment. By showing them you really do listen to what they say and want to help them, you will earn the right for them to follow you.

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Wouldn’t it be nice if desire were all that was required for success? Everyone would enjoy the lifestyle he or she desired. Homelessness would cease to exist. Psychologists and psychiatrists would have to find another line of work because they would have no more patients troubled by unfulfilling, unrewarding lives. Law enforcement agencies would see a sharp reduction in workload because career success would keep most criminals too busy to steal.

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USA TODAY printed the results of a poll that indicated that seven out of ten adults work outside the home, and that 91% of them like their jobs. Of those who enjoy their jobs, 32 % said they like the work itself; 23 % said they like their co-workers; 12% said they like the money; 7% said they like the hours; 6% said they like the company benefits; 3% said they like the boss; 16% said there were other reasons; and 1% said they didn’t know.

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In the classic comedy “The Pink Panther Strikes Again,” Peter Sellers as bumbling “Inspector Clouseau” learns the hard way about good and bad communication. The Inspector is checking into an inn and passes a small dog lying on the carpet of the lobby. The ordinarily uptight Inspector smiles at the sight of the creature and kneels as he asks the innkeeper demurely, “Does your dog bite?”

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